Friday, December 05, 2008

How I Ruined Santa for My Sister

This is a true story, according to my sister. Although I do not remember this. My sister shared this story during her toast to me at my wedding reception. I do not think I've ever laughed so hard in my entire life.

According to my sister, when I was around 9 or 10, and she was around 7 or 8, I sat her down on her bed and we had the following conversation:

Me: "Do you know what sex is?"

Heather: "Nooo. . ."

Me: "It's when Dad puts his penis in Mom's vagina!"

Heather: Painful, stunned silence.

After about five minutes of my letting this information sink in, I then add, "And there's no Santa Claus, either!"

My poor sister insists that Christmas was never the same for her after that.

But I am the older sister -- it was my job to share such knowledge with her.

Merry Christmas! (And Heather, I'm really, really sorry I did that to you!)

3 comments:

Heather said...

You are hilarious! I opened this and started laughing so I had to tell my coworkers the story. You are such a good big sister. You've always let me in on the big secrets of life. So thanks!

Love ya!
Heather

Butternugget said...

And you were being efficient, two very important conversations rolled into one!

Alannah said...

I love you and Heather!