Tuesday, February 12, 2008

My School is Crazier Than Ever

Last Friday we were told there were going to be two assemblies during advisory -- the girls were to report to the gym and the boys were to report to the auditorium. We were instructed to lead our students to those two places and remain with them throughout the presentations. It was not made clear how we were to be at two places at once.

So I sent my boys to the auditorium and I escorted my girls to the gym. We assumed this was going to be the sex talk or something similar. Turns out, the assistant principal decided that since most of the girl fights at school are over boys, we needed to get together and discuss the issue.

The school psychologist got the microphone and told the girls that they shouldn't be fighting over these boys. Then she opened the floor to questions. No one asked any questions. Then a special ed teacher got up and asked why we were having so many fights. No one answered.

Then a brave student got up and said that the problem was that everyone was dating the same boys and we needed to stop doing that. Then a senior girl got the mic and said this, "You freshmen girls need to stay away from the senior boys. Those boys are ours!"

Things got really good then. Freshmen girls were yelling that if the senior girls could do their job, the boys wouldn't be coming to the freshmen to get what they needed. Then the sophomore and junior girls were yelling about what they could offer the boys. Then the senior girls argued that their men were just going to come back to them, so there. It was so ghetto and ridiculous and these damn girls were ready to get it crackin and box (that is, start fighting).

There was also an enlightening conversation about who is a b (bitch) and who is a ho (everyone, apparently). Especially if you are sleeping with my man.

This went on for a good half hour, and no one was stopping it. I'm looking at the assistant principal -- she just stood there. I'm looking at the school psychologist. She kept saying, "This is such a good discussion." I couldn't take it any longer. I turned to my coworkers and said, "I'm going up there!"

So I made my way to the front of the gym through the throng of girls who wanted to box and got the mic. I said, "Ladies, I think you are missing the point. This is not about dividing yourselves. This is about unifying in the face of a serious problem. If your boyfriend cheats on you, it's not because you haven't done your job. It's not because you've done something wrong. It's because he doesn't respect you. Why would you allow yourself to be treated that way?"

Then I got fired up and starting preaching some more. I was nervous but I spoke really well. I can't remember all that I said, but it was all about female empowerment and whatnot. When I was done, all the girls who wanted to box over the mic had sat down. I finished and looked around and the teachers and a couple of girls clapped and that was it. I toddled back to my corner of the gym.

My friend JoAnn does a great imitation of my little speech -- apparently my accent was more pronounced than usual. That tends to happen when I get fired up.

Anyway, then a friend of mine got up and said the same things I said, basically. Then we all sat down and waited for the bell to ring.

I was really nervous about getting up there, because at my school, having a white lady get things back on track is not appreciated at all. But several people stopped me throughout the remainder of the day and thanked me for my remarks. And I guess people heard about it -- Miller, the 3rd floor security guard (who is always threatening to cut Todd) called me Preacher Fuji the rest of the day.

My speech did no good, however. There were girl fights every day last week. And as this is a short week and Valentine's Day is Thursday, there'll be fights every day this week, too. But hell, I tried.

6 comments:

Butternugget said...

That is both hilarious and awesome. The bit about your school being like an old episode of Ricky Lake is the hilarious bit.

I wonder what the boys were told?

Heather said...

Way to go! I'm so proud of you for getting up there. I would have peed my pants!

Alannah said...

I think you are 100% Awesome for doing what you did. You were totally right, too. SOMEONE needs to tell them....geez.

One of my favorite Valentine's Days ever was when you, Tera, and I went to James at the Mill. Remember?

AMY said...

That was one of my favorite Valentine's Days, too. We should do that again! Tera was in town in January, so we got to have lunch with her. Maybe you and I can go out when I'm home -- maybe Dad can babysit!

A W. Bolden said...

Glad you said something. SOmetimes people are whispering to each other that they wish "Somebody would do something or say something". Many times the prefer to praise the messenger more than the message . . .

A W. Bolden said...

Glad you said something. SOmetimes people are whispering to each other that they wish "Somebody would do something or say something". Many times the prefer to praise the messenger more than the message . . .