Summertime!

     I can't believe it's already the end of June, and I haven't blogged all month. I do love summer vacation. The kids and I joined the YMCA, which has been wonderful, and keeps us entertained so we don't kill each other. The kids started swim lessons this week, and this afternoon they go to their first martial arts class. I'm hoping I can make it to the mat pilates class at the same time -- otherwise I guess I'll hang out on the stairclimber for awhile.
     We've been going to open swim in the afternoons, which is not super fun, because it's super crowded, but the kids don't mind, and I try to move around a lot so it counts as exercise. My goal for this summer is to get in shape.
     The other day I remembered that my job offers incentives for employees to improve their fitness. When I got the email in January, my response was -- fuck that, I've got breast cancer. But now that I've gotten over the initial shock of the cancer bit, I decided this wellness plan was a good idea. And I can earn up to $450 just for filling out some forms and talking to a health coach.
     Friday night I worked on my health inventory. I was feeling pretty good, and I think I'm pretty healthy, but then I remembered the cancer part. But hey -- 50 bucks is coming my way just for filling out the form! And Saturday I'm having blood drawn so that my job can know my cholesterol and other health markers. I know  -- I appreciate that people don't want their employees knowing so much about that -- that's a fair concern. I am just thinking about what I can buy myself with my 450 bucks!
     I also remembered that as part of this employee wellness initiative, I can get WeightWatchers online for free. I have been tracking my food on MyFitnessPal, because it's free. But I liked WW well-enough -- and free is free. So I signed up for that, too. I'm not interested in being as thin as I was when I initially did WW. I would like to lose 20 pounds, though. So that's another goal.
     My main objective, however, is to be fit and hopefully cancer-free for the rest of my life. I am still running, slowly -- have to get to work on that. I've been doing a lot of yoga, and Emiko has been doing some yoga with me. I've gone to some yoga classes at the Y, too. I do love yoga.
     I've been meeting my friend Suzanne at the Rose Bowl to walk in the evenings -- that just started this week. We are aiming for Mondays and Thursdays at 7. Our goal is to run more than walk -- it was 108 degrees Monday night -- so we just walked. But I think we'll try to run more tonight. And it's nice to have adult conversation!
     My breast reconstruction is moving along. I had an injection last Thursday, and I go again tomorrow. I don't think I need much more pumping up -- I wonder what size I am right now? I'm anxious to get the surgery over with -- and wondering when that might be.
     I definitely look forward to not having the tissue expanders any longer -- they are a pain and feel awkward and get in the way. The permanent implants are supposed to just become a part of you. I am wondering if I'm still going to be able to wear my eShaki dresses -- as I will know longer be able to shimmy them over my boobs -- these boobs are not going to squish down like my real ones did. Another reason to lose a few pounds -- will make zipping the dresses up the sides easier. We'll see how that all plays out.
     I find myself still dealing with feeling insecure about my cancer boobs. Sometimes at the Y I will change in the changing room -- other times I just change at the bench and not worry about it. I've been encouraging Emiko to not worry about changing in the locker room -- that no one is looking at her. So I should set a good example. But my cancer boobs are alarming to look at -- which Emiko understands.
     Swimming is awesome because when I swim, these boobs feel natural and don't get in the way. It's a nice feeling.
     I saw my oncologist last Friday --  it was a quick visit. I have to see her every three months for the first two years, and then I'll see her every six months for three years. She examined my chest area and we discussed how I was adjusting to tamoxifen, and that was that. She gave me a hug when she left -- which doesn't usually happen with doctors!
     I guess those are your updates for this month. I need to blog more regularly. I keep telling myself that! But it's summertime! The living is easy!